Breeder's Cup: Not Just for Horses Anymore

Headline: Breeders' Cup adds three new races for 2008

After a 50 year absence, the Breeder's Cup is finally adding new races for humans. The races stopped in the mid-1950's because of the Irish monopoly in all three races: Number, Proximity of Births, and Baby Weight (all those potatos). But due to some recent trends, it now seems there will be enough competition to warrant the reinstatement of these races. The front runners continue to be the irrepressable Irish, but you can also expect the Trailer Trash to make a good showing. And, though The News Report does not encourage illegal gambling, I'm going to put all my money on the Christian Fundamentalists this year. You've all seen The Duggars on The Discovery Channel. That time when they met that other Christian family and their litter. Man, oh man, the Christian Fundamentalists will be hard to beat this year. It looks like the Irish's only hope is if they decide to add a Social Skills race and/or drinking race.